Everyone needs a hobby. I’m endlessly fascinated by the things people choose to do with their time. Some people garden. Some restore classic cars. Others train for marathons. And then there are those remarkable individuals who dedicate themselves to becoming deeply invested in the lives of people they watch from afar, filling in the gaps with stories they’ve invented in their heads. It’s niche, certainly.
I imagine it requires an impressive amount of free time. There are profiles to refresh. Comments to interpret. Coincidences to connect with red string that would make a conspiracy theorist nod in quiet approval. The administrative workload alone seems exhausting.
What surprises me most isn’t that people like this exist. Human beings are wonderfully strange. It’s that they appear to wake up every morning and think, “Yes. Today I’d like someone else’s life to continue being my primary project.” I can barely remember where I left my reading glasses. Some people, however, can apparently remember where I left mine. It’s almost flattering. Not really. It’s fucking weird.
I suppose we all need something that gives our lives structure. Some people volunteer. Some people mentor children. Some people learn Italian. Others decide to become unpaid historians of a complete stranger’s existence. It’s an unconventional career path, but who am I to judge?
Actually… I suppose I am judging a little. Mostly because it seems like such an unfortunate waste of potential. Imagine redirecting that level of persistence toward literally anything else. Learning the guitar. Starting a business. Walking every evening. Mastering sourdough. Finally figuring out how to fold a fitted sheet. The possibilities are endless.
Instead, they somehow become experts on a person whose greatest contribution to their life was existing in roughly the same timeline. That feels… inefficient. The older I get, the more convinced I become that your life should eventually become interesting enough that you stop trying to borrow someone else’s.
Maybe that’s adulthood.
Maybe it’s wisdom.
Maybe it’s emotional maturity.
Or maybe it’s simply realizing that the most successful people I know are usually too busy living to spend much time auditing someone else’s existence. It’s difficult to build a life while constantly peering over the fence into another one. Besides… If someone occupies that much real estate in your head, they’re probably getting a better deal than you are.
🎻 Charlotte